So my husband's family doesn't do Christmas or Halloween because of their beliefs (a lot of Jehovas Witness background). When we first got married I could see their points and understood why they felt that way and even did a little research myself. For the first 4 years of marriage, we didn't celebrate them at all and I always had that longing to because that's just tradition for me. It took me a long time to try to come to a way we could come to a compromise because hubby just put his foot down the whole time and said we weren't doing it plain and simple.
Well having my son made me want him to experience this and no matter how much I told him this is what I wanted to do, I couldn't justify it because he is good at arguing his point and I kind of suck at that. compared to him. Anyhow, my friend Brittany took me to Walmart one day last year and we looked at the Halloween stuff and I couldn't resist this cute little lion costume for LJ and it was only 10$. As scared as I was going against my hubby's wishes, I took him trick or treating anyways. I decided to stand up and just do what I wanted to do for a change...after all this is OUR child. He didn't end up coming with us, but he sure did eat some of the candy afterwards lol!
Then Christmas rolls around and he finally for the first time got to experience how my family does it. It was early right after Thanksgiving, due to to him having to deploy soon after. His Christmas was taken away from him when he was 3 years old. His parents just stopped doing it for their own reasons, which is fine-to each their own, but I never wanted that for my children. All I could think about was when I was younger and we would come back from Christmas break at school and tell each other what we got from Santa or family etc... and I could just see the look on my sons face when he had to say "nothing :(" That broke my heart so I was truly happy my husband got to see how my family celebrates it and that we give out of love for each other and it's more fun for the kids anyways you know. Anyhow, so we came back to San Diego from our visit to Charleston last year and as soon as we got home, we went to Target and he picked out a tree and the decorations. It was another side of him I had never seen. He was truly happy and excited and I knew then that we would be celebrating it from now on...which made me happy. Our compromise was that LJ and now Gage, will know that Santa is not real and instead he will get gifts from us because God has blessed us to be able to do those things for them. I am just so happy that we are making our own traditions and it's not an uncomfortable subject anymore:)
I was hoping that this Halloween he would want to participate, but he will not be here and said he had no desire to if he were here because he doesn't believe in it. I totally see his point, but I want to do it for the fun part of it...and that's it! It's just amazing how kids can make you really re-evaluate everything and actually change your mind about things!
Wendy I totally can feel ya on this. Mac went trick or treating when he was little, but then his parents all of a sudden stopped when he was younger. They said that it was a pagenistic holiday and that they weren't going to celebrate it. Mac and I have had many discussions about this. I grew up going trick or treating and thought that it was just childlike fun. I will admit some people do take it to the extreme....lol But we butted heads about this for the longest time. We had Myles and we were both were stubborn and set in our ways about it....lol Then I told Mac that if you are going to take this from him, when it is just for fun because you say its pagonistic,then we will not have the Easter bunny or basket, or a christmas tree or presents. Because to me that takes away from the true meaning. And besides the Christmas tree is actually pagonistic. I told him you can't pick and choose which holiday and which traditions you celebrate. So he ended up compromising with me. Myles and now Karlee are allowed to go trick or treating as long as they don't wear any ghosts, wearwolves, demons, ect costumes. So we will have happy costumes in the Caine Family :)
ReplyDeleteI have to admit I cried when I read this. I have never been one to lie to my kids and we have never even brought up santa.. The gifts our children get are always from us.. We will tell them who Santa Claus really was and that he is long since passed and we let them know the true meaning of Christmas. I think that building your own traditions is the best way to do it!
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